Post by iggy on Aug 20, 2021 14:55:02 GMT -5
Please note, this is simply a joke. If you are unable to laugh about anything vax-related, just don't read it.
We can’t wait to see you all soon at a show!
TRANSLATION: Every seat filled is money in our pocket! We're just glad we don't have to actually interact with any of you peasants.
We care so much about everyone involved in making this happen and all of you attending, so we will be requiring proof of full COVID-19 vaccination or negative test result within a certain time frame for your event (either 48 or 72 hours) to attend a majority of dates of the tour.
TRANSLATION: Yeah, so we got sucked into the whole political side of this stupid charade. The gov't probably has some dirt on our promoter. Our entire organization on down to Bob, Bill, Mickey, Oteil, etc. could honestly give a fuck less if you're vaccinated, but we are a big enough name that we can be used as pawns in all of this. You think they are making Counting Crows do this bullshit?
Additionally, all fans in the pit for each show will need to be fully vaccinated. Negative Testing is not an available option for pit entry.
TRANSLATION: I mean, that's incentive, right? I guess if you're foolish enough to pay what we charge for pit tickets then you are definitely foolish enough to get an experimental jab that the gov't says is good for you, when in reality if you are healthy enough to stand for 3 hours then you are healthy enough to beat COVID with your natural immune system.
Joining us at Citizens Bank Park on Saturday night? Avoid the lines on show day! Get your verification of vaccination or negative COVID test the day before.
TRANSLATION: Look, our staff hates their job enough as it is, and we don't pay them enough to give a shit how smoothly things go. If you all show up 30 minutes before showtime it's gonna be a ginormous clusterfuck and everybody's gonna be pissed off at everybody. So if all you unemployed mofos can get your sorry asses off the couch and handle this crap today, you'd be doing us a kindness. I don't know, maybe you can schedule a visit to your weed dealer around it.
As a bonus for those who get verified early – we’ll give you a commemorative pin from a previous Dead & Company show that you can’t find anywhere else (while supplies last)!
TRANSLATION: Yeah, so some schmuck in Merchandising had way too many pins created. I mean, who the fuck buys pins? So yeah, we're stuck with them but we'll give you one that you can shove in a drawer somewhere and quickly forget about.
We can’t wait to see you all soon at a show!
TRANSLATION: Every seat filled is money in our pocket! We're just glad we don't have to actually interact with any of you peasants.
We care so much about everyone involved in making this happen and all of you attending, so we will be requiring proof of full COVID-19 vaccination or negative test result within a certain time frame for your event (either 48 or 72 hours) to attend a majority of dates of the tour.
TRANSLATION: Yeah, so we got sucked into the whole political side of this stupid charade. The gov't probably has some dirt on our promoter. Our entire organization on down to Bob, Bill, Mickey, Oteil, etc. could honestly give a fuck less if you're vaccinated, but we are a big enough name that we can be used as pawns in all of this. You think they are making Counting Crows do this bullshit?
Additionally, all fans in the pit for each show will need to be fully vaccinated. Negative Testing is not an available option for pit entry.
TRANSLATION: I mean, that's incentive, right? I guess if you're foolish enough to pay what we charge for pit tickets then you are definitely foolish enough to get an experimental jab that the gov't says is good for you, when in reality if you are healthy enough to stand for 3 hours then you are healthy enough to beat COVID with your natural immune system.
Joining us at Citizens Bank Park on Saturday night? Avoid the lines on show day! Get your verification of vaccination or negative COVID test the day before.
TRANSLATION: Look, our staff hates their job enough as it is, and we don't pay them enough to give a shit how smoothly things go. If you all show up 30 minutes before showtime it's gonna be a ginormous clusterfuck and everybody's gonna be pissed off at everybody. So if all you unemployed mofos can get your sorry asses off the couch and handle this crap today, you'd be doing us a kindness. I don't know, maybe you can schedule a visit to your weed dealer around it.
As a bonus for those who get verified early – we’ll give you a commemorative pin from a previous Dead & Company show that you can’t find anywhere else (while supplies last)!
TRANSLATION: Yeah, so some schmuck in Merchandising had way too many pins created. I mean, who the fuck buys pins? So yeah, we're stuck with them but we'll give you one that you can shove in a drawer somewhere and quickly forget about.
